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If I were you, in fact, I would not care about being loved on false pretences. There is no reason why a man should show his life to the world. The world does not understand things. But with people whose affection one desires to have it is different. A great friend of mine—a friend of ten years’ standing — came to see me some time ago and told me that he did not believe a single word of what was said against me, and wished me to know that he considered me quite innocent, and the victim of a hideous plot concocted by your father. I burst into tears at what he said[152a], and told him that while there was much amongst your father’s definite charges that was quite untrue and transferred to me by revolting malice, still that my life had been full of perverse pleasures and strange passions, and that unless he accepted that fact as a fact about me and realised it to the full[152b], I could not possibly be friends with him any more, or ever be in his company. It was a terrible shock to him, but we are friends, and I have not got his friendship on false pretences. I have said to you that to speak the truth is a painful thing. To be forced to tell lies is much worse[152c].
事实上，假如我是你的话，不会介意装假而得人喜爱。 一个人没有理由非得把自己的生活向全世界公开。世界是不明白事理的。但是对那些你想博得他们关爱的人，就不同了。有一个很好的朋友，十年的老交情了，早些时候来看望我，说对我的指摘他一点也不信，要我知道他认为我是清白的，被你父亲炮制的毒计陷害了。听了他的话，我泪如雨下[152a]，对他说，尽管你父亲振振有词告我的罪状里面有好多是不实之词，是恶毒地嫁祸于人，但我在生活中还是曾经纵情于反常变态的肉体享受和怪异的情欲，除非他实事求是地接受并完完全全地了解这一事实[152b]，否则我就不可能再同他为友，甚至不能与他交往。他听了大吃一惊，但我们还是朋友，而我不是靠装假讨得这份友情。我对你说过，讲真话是件痛苦的事。被迫讲假话还要痛苦得多[152c]
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